what do you call a black pilot? A) a pilot

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Why is an orange, orange. Because you can't clean a window with a spade.

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Why do seagulls fly over seas? Because if they flew over bays they'd be called bagels.

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Yo mama's so fat that she takes too muc oh fuck it I'm stuffed Henri and Chaz

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Why did the the chicken cross the road? Escape.

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An asian without a future.

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What do you get when you read a book? More knowledge in your brain.

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Dick spice

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Why couldn't little Jessica open the door? It was locked

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knock knock whos there a boy a boy who ? oh, sorry he just got hit by a train.

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Welcome To Facebook

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Why was the little girl blowing bubbles in the swimming pool? Because she was drowning

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2 people with ADD are playing baseball. One of them pitches to the other guy and the other guy swings his arms around, misses, then gets hit by a baseball bat. The batter then realized he was the pitcher and the other guy has gone off chasing after a bird that just flew by.

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What is large, white, and can't climb trees? A refrigerator.

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An American man stopped me the other day and asked for the time, I looked at my watch and said: 5 o'clock.

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A kid walks into a bar. The bartender promptly calls child protective services and the child is placed in a caring foster home.

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How much carlins does it take to screw in a light bulb? One

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"How come dinosaurs don't talk?" " I don't know. Why?" " Because they're dead."

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I'm so hot my father calls me son.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom is dead And your dad is too

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How do you know it's a Mexican's birthday? They bring cupcakes to school for your entire class to enjoy.

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What do you get after putting bread in a toaster? -Toast.

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if life gives you lemonnde your probally halusinating

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops