watermelons are red, pineapples are yellow. i'm not a poet, say hello for me.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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How do you kill a circus? Go for the Juggler!

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana, Jack got high, pulled down his fly, and asked Jill if she wanna. Jill said yes, pulled up her dress, and had a little fun. But stupid Jill forgot the pill, and now they have a son

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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How do you keep children off your front lawn? Molest them.

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Why couldn't Sally ride a bicycle? She doesn't have a bicycle. She also doesn't have legs.

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Why is Santa fat? Because the apples are red.

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Why didn't Helen Keller learn to drive as a teenager? They didn't have cars back then.

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ROSES ARE RED WATCHES ARE GOLD GET ON YOUR KNEES AND DO WHAT YOUR TOLD

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What is the difference between a mom and a dad? One is a mom and the other is a dad. Why couldn't Fred see the board? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall?

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There are two hippopotamus' in a pond cooling off from the hot day. One is named Nathaniel IV and the other Timothy. Timothy asks Nathaniel, "Nathaniel, what day is it today?" Nathaniel then replies," I believe it is Tuesday." Timothy is taken back then replies," How odd. I could've sworn it was Wednesday."

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how do u know when your in west virginia? when the houses have more wheels than the cars

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A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead walk into a bar. There is also a woman with black hair standing outside, and the man next to her is bald.

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Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? He had no arms… Why did he have no arms? Jimmy was a potato

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There are four dead people on a boat. They commit suicide. Why did they commit suicide. To get to the other side!

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what is a model plus a poop plus a rhino plus a flamingo a peice of floob split in half or a shelby koon

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i love huge wieners.

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Roses are red Violets are blue this poem makes no sense Potato

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two penguins are sitting in a bath tub. one penguin says, "hey, can you hand me the soap?" the other penguin says, "what do i look like, a typewriter?"

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How much moss must a Moschops chop if a Moschops must chop moss?

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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