You know you have no friends when you write anti-jokes. [M]

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What do you do if a blond throw a grenade at you? Take the pin out and throw it back

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What do you get when an elephant and a penguin have a baby? Dunno, it's seems highly improbable.

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Justin Bieber having an erection.

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a blond, brunette, and red head all walk out of a hair salon.

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roses are blue violets, are orange, i am color blind

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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How does a muslim make his parents proud? He gets good grades.

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What's the difference between John Candy and Chris Farley? Nothing. They're both dead.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Speak to her in a nonsensical language of gibberish you have devised without her being able to understand or translate.

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What is the square root of 69? 8.306623863

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Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: I have no Idea what you would call cheese which isn't yours. However, it seems quite trivial to take time to discuss a nonsensical topic such as cheese which isn't yours.

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What do you tell a Woman with black eyes? Nothing you've already told her twice.

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What's worse than finding a fly in your coffee? The holocaust. What's worse than that? Two flies in your coffee.

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how many jews can you fit in a volkenswagen? 2 jews in the front 2 jews in the back 15 jews in the ashtray

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What happened when a 16 year old guy went over to his friends party? found out he wasn't friends with anyone there, got kicked out and committed suicide.

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What do you get when you cross North Korea and the boston marathon? BOMBS! :(

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connor sucks

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What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves.

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How many one does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What does a black man do when he breaks into a car? He steals the radio

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How do you mess with Helen Keller? Move all the furniture in her room.

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Roses are red Violets are blue One fish two fish Red fish blue fish

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Wade's the father

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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