What will happen if your heart skips 10 beats? Nothing. You're dead.

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What's the difference between a girl's mouth and her vagina? There is none. I want my penis to be inside both of those things.

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A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

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Why was the black man scared of the chainsaw? Because his father was killed by one when he landed on it when he fell of his ladder that was holding him up while he was cutting the limbs of a tree.

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Two fish were in a tank one said...."ill drive!"

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Hey I just met you And I am crazy So I will kill you And eat your body

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Whats worse than a Worm in Your Apple? Being raped

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what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

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Gay's rights

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How many Neurons does a bug have? - - - - - -- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- - - - - - -- - - - -- - - - - - -It's true

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You're so gay you actively seek homosexuals relationships.

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Why did suzy drop her popsicle? She was trampled by a homosexual moose.

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So joe diragi walks out of a gay bar...

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Q: What do AIDS and rape have in common? A: If you play guard for the Lakers, neither will affect you.

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What did one potato say to the other. Let's get baked!( hope u dont mind that this isnt a anti-joke well i dont know what it is so sue me)

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what do you call a black man at a school. coach.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Mind your own business.

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? You eat a pizza.

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what do u call a black man a black man

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How does Stevie Wonder pick up girls? He doesnt, he has someone do it for him

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What's black, blue and smells like fish? A dead penguin.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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