How did Ronald McDonald die? He was hit by a big mac

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Pickles

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roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

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An Irish man walks into a bar. He then sits down and enjoys his favorite drink.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

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There was once a boy named Swan, But then they built Autobahn.

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Why did the Asian woman drive 20mph on the highway? There was a deadly car accident with many fatalities.

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Why is Osama bimladin dead? Because he was a threat to American for many years, and someone finally found him and killed him.

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What is worse than seeing your whole family die? Leaving your wallet on the bus.

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Thumbs this down

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Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Wieners? A: Nothing. your last name is a male sex organ

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Sharks have teeth, I have teeth, Therefore i am a cat.

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what happened after 9/11?? 9/12.

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Why really answer a question when you can just respond, "because you touch yourself." For example, Q: Why did fluffy die? A: Because you touch yourself.

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Your mother is so fat that when she steps on a scale it shows her a weight that she is not very satisfied with

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What's worse than losing $100 at the racetrack? Losing at Russian Roulette

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have you tasted chocolate flavoured slurpee? no. i haven't either

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got into the car? "Robin, get in the car."

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Four homosexuals walk into a bar and theres only one bar stool left how do they all sit down on that one bar stool. They flip the bar stool around and sit down all together

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Two scientists walk into a bar. One says "I'll have H20", the other says "I'll have a beer." The first one is the one to drive them to their homes.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Neither has Stevie Wonder

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roses are blood violets are veins vampires are crazy and you are insane

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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