What do you call a man with a black book? I don't know.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A pig rolls in the mud.

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How did Elmo get his show? Because the kids loved his furry ass and hoped to be on with dorthy

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Q: Why cant dinosaurs talk A: Because they are dead.

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Q:If an apple and an orange had a politicial debate, what would it concern? A:Nothing important.

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What sound does a baby make in a blender? Idk, i was too busy masturbating to hear.

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Guess what I saw today?..........Nothing I'm Blind.

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How do you scare Chris Ferguson? No one knows, he always has a pokerface on.

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What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

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I farted!!!!! t'was smelly??????? I LIKE CRABS! #tomato problems

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Q: What do you call a man driving a van with a bunch of stuff in the back that doesn't belong to him? A: A delivery man

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had alopecia.

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What do you call a car with no wheels or engine? Immobile

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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A duck walked up to the lemonade stand And he said to the man running the stand: QUACK!

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Why was the guy sad? His son killed himself after being constantly bullied for 6 years.

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yo mama's so fat!!!

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Gotta go Mark Gotta go Mark MARK MARKMARKMARK! Moving at the speed of mark I'm the quickest mark around Got ourselves a mark Start getting a new mark Without any mark On top of mark! Go- Go- Go- Don't mark Don't mark Just markmarkmarkmark! mark, he's on the run mark, he's number one mark, he's coming next so watch out for mark X! Gotta go mark, gotta go mark mark mark markmarkmark Go go go go go go go go go! marrrrrkkk X!!

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Roses are red violets are blue i got two fingers just for you/by kw

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It was hit by an oncoming motorist in a busy intersection.

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What's the difference between a pile of bricks and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of bricks in my basement.

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Why does Owen Wilson have an ugly nose? Because of his refusal to get plastic surgery.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? You can't jelly my dick down your throat.

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When is a tree not a tree? When it's a rock.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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