8====D~~~~~~

thumb_up thumb_down -7

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is long and hard on a black man? First grade.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what did the man do when he went to save the other man from drowning? drowned with him...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A politician from the National Country Party keeps interjecting - "I'm a country member, i'm a country member' "yes we remember" says Gough whitlam

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the dad do immediately do after his child died? Cleaned off the knife.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a black astronaut? It depends on what his name is.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did one deaf mute say to the other deaf mute?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A pussy walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bar keeper asks " why are you such a pussy!" The pussy then says, "it's not my fault I'm a cat!" before getting run over

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A Jew, a Mormon, and an Atheist walk out of a bar. They all get in a car with the Jew driving. They were all deceased do to the fact of a very large car accident. Know your limits. Don't drink and drive!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man buy's a new lawn mower, it breaks so he takes it back. The shopworker says that if you don't have a recipt then you cannot replace it, the man goes home and months later catch's a flu.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the guy say to the other guy? LOOK AT MY EYEBROWS!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you do when you have those days where you feel that you go back three damn steps for every step you take towards your goal? DUUUUUH! You turn your back, see? Now you are getting three steps at the right direction for every right one! LOGIC!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer? This would be unlikely to happen, as it would cut the story short.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

You have 6 basketballs. One rolls away. How many do you have? None because your family has a low income, lives in a broken down trailer, and has 5 other kids to supply for.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What kind of cheese doEs god like? Swiss cheese because it's holy!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do you make a doctor cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock Knock! Who's there? Pen. Pen who? Pen is blue.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: Your mother sucks.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did little jimmy get for Christmas? A box containing the malevolent soul of a 10,000 year-old demon determined to torment his cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock Knock Who's there? Luke Futie

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock Knock Who's there? *silence* Silence Who?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops