What is purple and flies? A purple plane.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Oh wait i screwed up, Because of u

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Roses are yellow Violets are yellow bark bark

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How do you make a clown sad? Rape his wife, choke his grandma and send him a video of you setting his children on fire.

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a customer walks into a store and says, "the customer is always wrong." the employee replies, "no, the customer is always right." "you just contradicted yourself."

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What are little Timmy's hopes and dreams? Destroyed.

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What happened when Aladdin rubbed his lamp? It got slightly cleaner.

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Q: Why did the girl fall off the swing? R: Because she had no arms.

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Why did the mother have a club in her hands covered with red liquid? She spilled her bloody murry while playing golf.

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guess what? chicken butt.

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What do you call George Mills? A very kind, sensitive person with a poor music taste.

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Why did the jew die Really...

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Knock Knock I don't have a door. I'm Homeless

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. What about the vampires?

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A terrorist walks into a bomb shop. He soon realizes he's in the wrong shop, leaves and goes on with his day.

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An boy with ADHD walks into a

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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Whats the differance between a lawnmower and a sack of dead babies? I dont have a lawnmower in my garage

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What did the gay man say to the deaf man? I don't know, I can't hear.

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I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the rest of te people in his car.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on the front porch? Matt What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a hole? Phil What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating down the river? Bob

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Why is a blonde a door knob... Because everybody gets a turn

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What's the difference between dogs and humans? 8.

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Once upon a cross

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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