what do you call a animal with 3 horns. a triceratops

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Why was the Asian women crossing 8 lanes of traffic with no blinker? Poor chink had a seizure.

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Why did Chad find dead people all over the playground? Ask him, it's not like he's pointing a gun at your face.

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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What is the answer to the universe? I would tell you but you would get board.

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What do you call your fist? Trying to talk to an appendage would indicate that you suffer from mental issues stemming from dysentery or lack of oxygen, and as a medical professional, I would recommend seeing a specialist.

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Steve,Jerry and tom all go into the mens toilets, because they are men.

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What did george washington say before he and his troops crossed the delaware river? We are going to cross the delaware river. R...

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why did the dog go inside the church? cuz the door was open.

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Betty Whites ALIVE?

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A blind guy was reading the newspaper, it said flying cars. I bet he did'nt see that coming!

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 1027

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

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A man is eating a sandwich. He is promptly shot in the face.

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A drunk is pissing on the plaza and the cop stands next to him and says, very nice. The drunk says, that's what she said. : )

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A kid walks into a bar. The bartender promptly calls child protective services and the child is placed in a caring foster home.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa, a Minute passes.

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roses are red violets are blue bannas are yellow so is my wife

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Three kids are standing on a corner. They have red hair, blue hair, and green hair respectively. A man asks the kid with red hair "How did you get your hair red?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man then asks the kid with blue hair, "How did you get your hair blue?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man finally asks the kid with green hair, "How did you get your hair green?" The kid wipes his hand across his nose, gathering green slime and replies, "I dyed it."

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A Black man a Chinese man and a Jew walk in to a bar. Black man: nice place they got here Asian man: yeah I remember when it used to be that old hardware store Jew: Henry's, i think it was called Aisian man: must have been there for at least 10 years or so

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A priest, a rabbi, and a whale sit down at a bar. The priest says to the bartender, "Jesus Christ is our savior." The rabbi responds, "No. Our savior has not yet been born." To which the whale adds, "MMMUUURRRAAAAAAOOOUUU!!!"

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck at poetry, show me your tits!

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What did the camera man say when the actor took off his pants? Why did you take off your pants?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father, prepare to die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops