Whats worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

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If it looks like chicken and tastes like chicken but Chuck Norris says it's beef, politely correct him. He is actually a very sensible fellow and will probably thank you for doing so.

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What do you call a black man with a group of 5 white guys? Friends. What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys? a diffrent ratio of black and white friends.

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How do you stop 5 black guys from raping a girl? You call the proper authorities. Don't try to be a hero.

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Why did 12 people die when they went to see The Dark Knight Rises movie premiere? Because they were shot and bled profusely resulting in quick, painful death.

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How do you stop a car? Put on the Brake

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There is a man who is half black half Jewish. He walking up a hill really fast. What happens to him? Answer: The Jewish side of his body will fall off and the black side will walk away.

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Why did the monKey fall out of the tree? He died Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first one

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Where do babies come from? My garage

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What's the difference between 6th graders and Jews? 6th graders make it back from camp. :)

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

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Q. How do you kill a dumb blonde? A. Shoot her.

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how many dead babys can fit in a bathtub 17

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A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

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How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? 23

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? Sitting on a black man is just plain rude.

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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

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What's the difference between Micheal Phelps and Adolf Hitler. Michael Phelps is an Olympic swimmer who has won many gold medals in the 2008 Olympics in swimming races and is considered to be one of the greatest swimmers ever. Adolf Hitler was a terrible man who was the leader of the Nazi party during the World Wars. He ordered to kill eight million Jews, causing what is called the Holocaust. He is considered one of the worst men in human history. Other immature people would say Micheal Phelps can finish races.

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A moose walks into a grocery store, he asks the deer where he could find some bisquits, the deer says "oh it's in aigle 6." So the moose goes to aigle 6...and there ain't no bisquits!

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Why didn't the man finish his dinner? His dinner was a wheelchair.

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dick in your mouth just kidding haaaaaa

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How do you spell eight? 8

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Q: What has 1 eye and half of a pig's snout? A: A pig peeking around a corner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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