I have Alzheimer. What?

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What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? heart worms

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Oh, then I'm not opening the door.

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There are two hippopotamus' in a pond cooling off from the hot day. One is named Nathaniel IV and the other Timothy. Timothy asks Nathaniel, "Nathaniel, what day is it today?" Nathaniel then replies," I believe it is Tuesday." Timothy is taken back then replies," How odd. I could've sworn it was Wednesday."

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Communism, Capitalism and an Irish man walk into a bar. Communism says, “I’ll buy the drinks but I require your complete obedient consent.” Capitalism says, “No I’ll buy the drinks but I require that you pay me back with interest” and the Irish man says “No I… I don’t feel very well at all… Oh shite I’ve got the bloody runs!” He then proceeds to shit myself.

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Your mother is so fat........... that she is morbidly obese and is at severe risk for diabetes and other weight related diseases.

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3 Mormon men walk by a blonde woman eating a banana. They are not distracted by this and continue their journey of spreading Christianity.

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There women are stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven. Ha ha ha ha

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What did Hitler say to the lady right next to him before the both committed suicide? I don't know, I don't understand German. I also wasn't there.

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How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen Bug? Four in the seats, twenty six in the ash tray, and thirty in the gas chamber.

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What's meaner than taking candy from a baby? Throwing the baby off a cliff.

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What's 17 times worse than a 3? I don't know, personally I don't think 3's are so bad.

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96

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What would Guy and Hemech's reactions be if they saw this joke up? They would see it from the newest jokes

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Wanna hear a joke? JORDAN SANDERS IN A RELATIONSHIP.

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your father died

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Can you get me a stapler,make sure it has staples because if it doesn't..........I won't be a ble to staple anything

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What's red and smells like green paint? The rotting corpse of the old lady I poisoned with green paint.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running from its imminent death. It was being chased by a dog with a shark's head and chainsaws for legs. It was only delaying the inevitable.

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A

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Yo momma is so fat, that she is not able to wear the clothes she wore the previous year.

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Why did the jew pick up the unicorn lying on the sidewalk? Because he dropped it.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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