Why don't Polish women use vibrators? They are extremely conservative Catholics.

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Why couldn't the ten year old watch a porno movie? Because it was on blu-ray and his family only owned a regular dvd player.

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Q: Ask me how far have you gone with a girl? A: Mexico

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Why is god mean? Cause he doesn't like you.

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Knock Knock! I have a door bell, you idiot!

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What do you call a guy who died in a stampede? Grandpa.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, And I'm blind.

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Two muffins are being baked in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "Man, it's starting to get really hot in here." The other muffin says, "MUFFINS CAN TALK?!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay man's house. Knock knock... Who's there? The Chicken

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An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

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Knock knock Who's there? Yo mamma Nobody's home, go away mom

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My name is never spelt right so its all good

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What does a plum and a rabbit have in common? A: they're both purple, except for the rabbit!

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There was a man sinking in quick sand. He looked in the sky and said, "God, if you spare my life, I'll be a great person and believe in you all my life." He died.

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lol

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A black and a mexican jump off a building, What a tragedy...

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What's a fail with a bowl on its head, a 30 year old, and a 5 year old at the same time? Justin Beiber

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbuluDBHpfQ

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A doctor is delivering a baby on April fool's day. He says, "Congradulations, it's a boy." He then says,"April fools! Your child was stillborn."

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What do you call a black man with cancer? A very unfourtunate man.

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What is long and black? Some umbrellas.

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HEY YOU!!! just checking for assholes

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What did the lemon say to the turtle? If you think the lemon said anything, something is wrong with you.

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Knock, knock. Who's there. Death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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