What is the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Lamborghini I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What requires lots of rubbing, dirty pictures, and leaves you happy for a little bit, but then you realize you're sad and lonely? A minimum wage job where you clean pictures.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Jackson gets a new phone he drops it what does he have. (a beating )

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Trees are like friends. They both fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

You mamma so fat, she should consider going on a diet.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

The cow went moo

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What clicks when its out of lead ? A gun Why was the little black boy crying ? He ran out of that grape drank How do you make a dead baby float ? You take your foot of its head How do you know when your life is over ? When you start watching Twilight What is blue and sticky ? Blue Stick What do you get when you mix a dog and a cat ? Shit

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What is worse than falling down the stairs? Having leukemia.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what did the guy tell the other guy? you're gay

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did timothy say after he went to go golf? - I just went golfing

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's the difference between a jew, a muslim and a christian. They follow different belief systems

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Two cats were in a bathtub. They both, however, were uneasy the whole time, as it is common sense to know that cats do not like being in water.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the the boy get from his grandma for Christmas. Nothing. she died a week ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a hispanic and black man flying a plane? A pilot and his co-pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

whats the diffrence between love and faling in love when u love some one your not falling

thumb_up thumb_down +16

how many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? usually one but depending on the severity of the patients' case the lightbulb will be changed by a person who is willing to offer their assistance as to prevent any form of accident taking place.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did Little Timmy fall off of his bike? Because he was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator. Knock knock Who's there? Not Little Timmy.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's funnier than a dead triceratops? Nothing, nothing at all...in fact this is scary because the triceratops and their other Cretaceous herbivores, have been extinct for over 3.5 trillion years... ........also if you see a dead triceratops, you're probably tripping on LSD.........

thumb_up thumb_down +16

water, hydrated silica, glycerin, sorbitol, PVM/MA copolymer, sodium lauryl sulfate, flavor, cellulose gum, sodium hydroxide, propylene glycol, carrageenan, sodium saccharin, titanium dioxide all adds up to colgate. SO AS A MATTER OF FACT, CHEESE PLUS PIE IS CHICKEN. CONSIDERING THE FACT THAT I LIKE SAYING CHEESE, JACK AND JILL WENT UP THE HILL BECAUSE THEY WERE BAGELS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A black man, a white man and a Mexican are in a car... Who is driving... A police man

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a gay couple of kangaroos adopted baby A Joey

thumb_up thumb_down +16

your mamas so fat all she gets for christmas and her birthday is girdles!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Jack and Jill climbed up the hill .... and fetched a pail of water.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur nothing dinosaurs can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops