whats yellow sticky and smelly? I dont know i was asking you

what did the 3 hispanic men say to the fat guy? you're in our seats

knock knock who's there? no one, but I appreciate the fact you asked.

A man walked into a bar, was surprised to find his wife with another man, and had a heart attack.

Why didn't the monkey fall out of the tree when someone threw a refrigerator at it? Because it was already lying on the floor dying of AIDS.

What's green and has four wheel? A tractor.

What did the beaver say to the other beaver? Nothing because beavers are wild, indigenous species thus incapable of speech.

how do make you a child cry? break his fingers

A blind guy was reading the newspaper, it said flying cars. I bet he did'nt see that coming!

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None.

Why is 6 afraid of 7. Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its dopaminergic neurons fired synchronously across the synapses of its caudate nucleus, triggering motor contractions propelling the organism forward, while emitting 'cluck' distress signals, to a goal predetermined by its hippocampal road mappings.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They took away privileges that she normally would have had had she not misbehaved.

whats the only concert you can get into for 45 cents? a 50 cent concert featuring Nickelback

What's the difference between George Washington and Wiz Khalifa? George Washington died many years ago.

;aosughdfo

A man walks into a bar. He has a drink. Then goes back home.

Q: Whats red and circular? A: A red circle

What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Half the holocaust

There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

What did the boy who got picked on everyday do? He took the bullies advice and killed himself.

Why are we on a roof? Becuse some idiot gave us all roofies.

Why wasn't Fred invited to he party? Because he's been dead for five years

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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