What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

A cow was very inconveniently standing in the middle of a golf course. An alligator dragged the cow into a swamp. The cow dies

What did the Asian bookkeeper say to the Jewish dog? I love you

Roses are red, Violet are violet, not blue, dumbass.

What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

An Irish man walks into a bar. He then sits down and enjoys his favorite drink.

what do a plane and a mouse have in common? nothing

Electronic Arts is a respectable company.

what's worse than a kitten scratching your arm? A dead baby scratching your arm...

A mushroom walks into a bard and the bartender admonishes him and tells him to leave. The mushroom says "Aw, c'mon...you stupid jerk!"

what did one tree say to the other? move over

what did batman say to robin before they got into the batmibile "get in the batmoblie"

What is another word for a woman that ends in unt. Aunt.

A Black man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder and the bar tender says " thats something weird you got there". The parrot says "yeah i found it on the street".

Why did the chicken cross the road? To kill a hooker and get his money back.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

What's the funniest part about this site? You're alone and reading this joke instead of getting a date.

What did the Anti-Semitic man say to the Jewish man beside him? Hello.

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

Want to hear a good joke? The NBA.

GONNA

How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Pick it up and suck its dick.

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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