Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Dani barton= lovely

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Why did the rabbit fall out of the tree? because it was dead Why did the bird fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the rabbit

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how do you make a blonde snowman? hollow out the head.

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How do you kill a dinosaur with a spoon? You cant because they are extinct creatures

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I'm gay. No homo.

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Why does Danny work at the factory? Because Danny is in an substantial economic crisis, and doesn't have enough money to afford food for his 6 kids and wife. They will all most likely die soon, as his factory job will not provide enough money.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue I like poo F*** on You By drew bolton

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Bob

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What happened to the man who dropped his soap? Nothing he picked it up and lived a happy life.

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When life gives you lemons, throw them at pedestrians.

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-What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. Animals can't talk dumbass.

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-Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? -No -Niether have they

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A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

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Money is no object. Because I don't have any.

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Your mother is so fat that she has diabetes

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.forty-two

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What's red, white, and black all over? A panda shot and killed by a poacher.

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What is the difference between a duck? It can neither ride a bike.

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What did the priest say to Jesus when he revealed himself on Christmas morning? Happy birthday

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what's the hardest part about microwaving a baby? holding the camera and masturbating

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Two penguins are in a bathtub, one penguin asks the other "can you pass the soap?" the other penguin says "what do I look like? A toaster?"

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why is the black man black? because he isnit white

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Person 1 : i need to sneeze Person 2 : ok ( person 1 sneezes ) Person 2 : bless u ( few seconds later ) did u sneeze? Person 1 : yep :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops