What did the statue say to the other statue? Nothing, statues cant speak.

A caterpillar walks into a bar. I don't know how he opened the door.

A blonde woman walked into a bar. She ordered a scotch.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: How should I know?

So 2 black guys walk into a bar and the bartender looks around and say "what will you fine gentlemen have?" and they order and payed their tab and could not have been more courteous, amirite?

How do you get a Blonde to switch seats with you? Ask her politely.

There once was a girl named sally with no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally.

Why did the robot cross the road? Because it was a banana.

one day 2 strawberrys walked to the ice cream store and ordered a small cup of banana ice cream they were realley happy they were later taken in and tortured and raped

a boy walks over to the living room and shouts " happy birthday, daddy!!" the response is "i'm a cup, therefore i do not have a birthday because i am an inanimate object."

my nAME IS ALAN AND IM NOT COOL

Cancer.

What do you call a room with a black person, a mexican, a jew, and a homosexual A diverse area

poop is very very yummy.

Q: What's the difference between a vampire and a lawyer? A: A lot of things.

Why did the man walk into the bar? Because he wasn't looking where he was going

how do you fit 20 babies into a bucket? you put them into a blender. how do you get them out? chips.

A Mexican walks up to a fence in Texas and watches as the police take away his next door neighbor for tax evasion.

Why did the chicken cross the road it didn't, it was hit by a bus.

.....Carrot Top....

What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? By his name, which could be John, considering the popularity of said name.

A black man walks into a bank with a gun......he is a 25-year veteran SWAT team officer attempting to arrest two armed robbers that have 5 old ladies hostage.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A fat man fell on him

Q: Why did the prostitute have no arms? A: Because she was an amputee.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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