Why couldn't little Sally talk? Someone stapled her tongue to wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels Why did bobby die? He was hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why do white people despise black people? Because they are good at everything we suck at.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

How much does a polar bear way? Near 1,100 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What did the man say after falling off a bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

javascript:alert("your own");

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What does Ke$ha feel like when getting up in the morning? Shit because she has a nasty hangover.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

How do you feed a mockingbird? Give it some food.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Roses are red, Violets are black, Why is your chest, as flat as your back

thumb_up thumb_down +38

How heavy duty are your nachos? No, because babies simply cannot swallow blenders.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Wanna hear a joke? Sure Niiiiggggeeee what is the last letterThe last letter is NOT and R! Its an R. Good job honey

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Q. What do you call a small hen that can't lay eggs properly? A. A small hen that can't lay eggs properly.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How do you kill a blonde? you shoot her.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why was the boy crying? Because his parents were in a car crash and died and his grandparents were already dead and he got cancer for christmas. And he had no testicles

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Q.whats the worlds funniest joke???? A.not this one this ones crap

thumb_up thumb_down +36

- How can you call a person, who hasn't got a left eye, a left hand and a left leg? - All right.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

WHATS BALCK AND YELLOW AND UNDER WATER? A BUMBLE BEE IN A SUBMARINE.... YEAH YOU BETTER #$%^ING LAUGH YOU HOMO

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why doesn't Gary like me? Because I killed his family and fed them to him.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

How do you blindfold and Asian? By using a sturdy bandanna, cloth, any other object to avert ones view.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did the chicken cross the road? No soap, radio!

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Society.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

what's shaped like a tree? a tree

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops