how do you make money? you roba bank! :)

How do you stop a fire breathing dragon from breathing fire? Shove a hose down its throat.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a bus.

Penis.

Friends are like potatoes. When you eat them, they die.

An Irish priest molested many children. He's still free today

What is worse than a fly in your soup? Getting hit by a train.

Ken: Your dog is sick, he needs to see a vet. Megan: Omg, what is it? Ken: It's a medical person who treats animals.

Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

I like my women the way I like my coffee: Without a penis.

The Irish man was sober.

What happened to the peanut who went to NYC? Nothing because he was eaten on the plane

There are two gingerbread men in an oven and the one says " it's hot in here" the other says "holy crap it's a talking cookie!!!!!!!!"

What do you get if you cross a banana, a mango, and an apple? A smoothie

What do you call: A black person, A white person, A mexican, A Jew, And an athiest? Whatever their names are!

Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

What's white or grey or brown or green or black or yellow or purple ? Could be almost anything, really.

What did the fat girl say to her friend? I'm fat.

Bye, Ax... Nerochan, you just gonna leave me in this state? I mean wont you stop it? I know hypnosis and all but I mean I have like black belt in hypnosis but since you began it, I do not really want to stop it.

Q: is this the krusty krab? A: No this is patrick!

What did the general say before the soldiers got in the tank? Get in the tank

What do you call a gay black man driving off a cliff? A fine example of the dangers of drink driving.

"You've got a lot of C in your body." said the doctor. Jimmy replied with glee: "Ah that's great news, vitamin C is.." "No you've got Hepatitis C, you'll be dead within a month."

Why did Riley cross the road? A: I lied he started to then proceeded to get hit by a bus filled with children causing them all to be scarred for life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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