Henry: Say the word "really". Moe: Really. Henry: Now say the word "really" with sarcasm. Moe: Really? Henry: More sarcasm! I want you to be very sarcastic! Moe: Oh really??? Henry: There ya go!

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why did the homeless man buy a mansion? he didn't. i lied. he would need a job to be able to buy a mansion.

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How do you shoot a basketball? With your hands

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What's round and red? A red and round solid.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream cone? Man's inhumanity to man.

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Whats black, blue, and doesn't like sex? The little boy in my trunk.

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex.

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Why did the teacher yell at her students? The class was acting completely inappropriate and she felt it was necessary to discipline them so the current situation won’t repeat its self.

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Why was the man thought to be peculiar? Because he had sex with a pistachio.

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whats purple and savage? Barney!

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There are too many 20 year olds getting pregnant. Teenage pregnancy is ruining our society!

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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What word does almost everyone spell wrong? Wrong.

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Q: What sucks? A: Straws

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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How do you keep a black man from robbing your house? Lock your doors, or perhaps get a update-to-date security system.

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Billy's alarm clock went off at 8:00 AM but Billy was really tired but still his Dad forced him to go to school.

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How many dislikes can this get?

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What did the one bagpiper say to the other? Nothing, one cannot speak while playing the bagpipes.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names

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"One fish, two fish, red fish, the holocost." -Dr. Seuss

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What do you call a group of black people? A group, you racist.

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what did the jewish kid get for his birthday......Striped pajamas

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What's the difference between women and a bucket? before 1923, women didn't have the right to vote. Bucket's still don't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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