Knock knock. Who's there? Open the fucking door. Open it! This is a fucking robbery. This is not a fucking joke. Get down on the ground. Shut that baby up. Shut that fucking baby up! Now! Get on the fucking ground or I swear to Christ I will fucking end your life. Tell the kids to go to their room. Do it. Do it, you fucking bitch! Where's the fucking jewelry? You got any money stashed anywhere? Come on, I know it's here. Keys? Your husband got any guns? Give me everything valuable or I swear to god, I will fucking murder you in front of your son. The woman was brutally raped for hours.

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what do you call a boomerang that never comes back? stick

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What is Freddie Mercury's favorite planet? Earth.

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no

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Why did the black man rob the bank? Well..why not?

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raping black women

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Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

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why is a squirrel called a squirrel? that's its name.

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What's really weird? It's you Greg!

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Whats worse than 3 black people? 4 Black people

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Does this napkin chloroform?

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Whats red and smells like cherries? Cherries

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Did you hear about the blonde that went to college? She got a degree.

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What do you call a black guy flying a helicopter? A pilot.

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why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

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A marine biologist is captured by a group of violent pirates. After hours of being tortured, the pirates make him walk the plank. As he is pushed on to the plank, they ask him for his one last request. He responds "Kill yourselves." The pirates proceed to stab themselves until they bleed out and the marine biologist is the last man on the boat.

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Sure, I like all kinds of Juice. -Apple Jews -Grape Jews -Orange Jews The list goes on,,,

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Barack Obama

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what do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? nothing since it is impossible to combine a cat and a dog

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I get no respect at all. That's because I am a liar and a thief with no redeeming qualities.

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Whats the difference between a jewish man wearing a fedora and glass of almond milk? Ones a glass of almond milk.

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What is the difference between a car and dead babies? The car is legally obtainable by law and can run on gasoline, when dead babies are nonliving humans, and the owner of which would most likely be sent to jail.

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A man runs into a bar. He is instantly knocked out.

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Q:What did I get for Christmas? A:You, put on this leash.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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