What is red and does not cry? Half a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock Knock. Who's There? silence... Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats big, white, and will kill you if it falls out of a pine tree? A refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Two dogs walk into a room. What a fine example of two dogs walking into a room.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what's really good and is on TV Jersey Shore

thumb_up thumb_down +15

If an atom bomb falls in a town, does it make a sound? Not to most people, as they would be killed in a massive catastrophe that will be etched into their ancestors minds for years to come, not to mention radiation poisoning and deformation.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Yes. Just Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A fish and a human had a conversation. The conversation was not interesting because fish can't speak and the human felt awkward.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: How many light bulbs does it take to change a blonde? A: One, if she tries to swallow it.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why couldn't the girl throw the baseball over the fence? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why does Polly want a cracker? Because meth is too intense.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbour. My neighbour who? Timothy, welcome to the neighbourhood!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock Knock. Who's there? God. God Who? ::Apocalypse follows::

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock Knock. Who's there. To. To who. To whom.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Two women are sitting quietly in a corner, minding their own business.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you get when you cross a third edition X-19 TQRFT scooter with a teal-colored pencil? A third edition X-19 TQRFT scooter with a teal-colored pencil on it.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What happened to the little kid who went surfing? Answer: he gOt eaten by a shark

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A bear walked into a bar, unfortunately there were no survivors.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

The original joke: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT HOLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" The anti joke, aka realistic edition: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT YAAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHHHH!" The ballon edition: Original: "Balloon! Watch out for that Cactus!" "What Cactussssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss..." (leaking air you slowmo) The anti-joke aka realistic version: "Balloon watch out for that pointy soda!" "What soda *pop*" Moral: None of these where the least realistic!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? Four, one to take the light bulb out, one to put a new in, one to hold the ladder, and one to hold the guy holding the ladder

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Yo momma is so fat I really feel sorry for her.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops