A plane crashes on the border of the United States and Canada. Where do they bury the survivors? Why would they bury the survivors? THEY'RE ALIVE

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a fish.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but I'm your stalker, welcome to my deserted warehouse.

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When do scientologists go to church? When they are done looking at porn.

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A man is training his dog. He tells the dog to sit. The dog sits. "Good boy!" said the man. The dog did not thank the man for the compliment because dogs cannot speak.

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How do you drown a blond? Glue a mirror to the bottom of a pool!

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why couldn't the chicken cross the road? it was hit and killed by a vehicle, much like all animals that try and cross roads. created by KA

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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Why did the girl jump? Because she was on a trampoline.

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What has legs but can't walk? A paralyzed man.

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how do make you a child cry? break his fingers

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a red sports car? A red sports car was never a living organism.

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Q: Little black thing with a little red thing on it. What is it?! A: Ant with a broken nose...

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one day four teenage boys started doing drugs. They jumped off a cliff and died.

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what did the train say to the other train choo chooo

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What's red and has a mask ? Blood, I lied about the mask.

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Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them..

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How many Jews can fit in a VW Beetle? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, and maybe one in the trunk, but that wouldn't be very comfortable.

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Q: Why was the duck hands down hilarious? A: It wasn't, ducks don't have hands and with human beings able to be equipped with emotions such as to see an object or living organism as funny, do not view these mammals in a humorous manner.

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What did the the Priest do to the young alter boy? Blessed Him

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What do people in Asia do for black history month? Nothing, black history month is an American thing.

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What do you call a guy who hangs around with musicians? A groupie.

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Penis in a butthole. Consentual Sex.

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An Octopus walks into a bar and sees that there are multiple people with instruments. The man with the Guitar says "I bet you cant play the Guitar better than Led Zeplin?" So the Octopus plays and he is better than Led Zeplin. Then the man with the Piano says "I bet you can't play the piano better than Elton John?" So the Octopus Plays it better than Elton John. The Last man from Scotland says " i bet you can't plat the bagpipes better than me?" So... The Octopus is playing around with the Bagpipes and they say to him "Hurry Up!" and the Octopus says "Shut up, I'm trying to have sex with it but first I need to get it's pajamas off" (Bagpipes have 8 long things you blow into and they have a pattern that looks like a pajama pattern) hahaha

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops