Q: What do Obama and George Washington have in common? A: They are both intelligent, trustworthy presidents who truly care for what is best for the United States. Except for Obama.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

An Irish man walks out of a bra.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A black person and a hispanic person are in a car, who is driving? The black person, after all it's his car.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

roses are red violets are blue my cat died and i have alsheimers who are you

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q. What does a rock and a bird have in common? A. Everything. Except a bird can fly and has wings and can breath and eats and makes babies...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

whats your name? bumder:)

thumb_up thumb_down

It burns when I pee sometimes.

thumb_up thumb_down

So an Indian walks into a bar and says: ? ?? ??? ?????? ??? ??? ? ??? ??? ??????

thumb_up thumb_down

a person cries in the corner you go over to them and rape them

thumb_up thumb_down

how do you keep a black kid from jumping on the bed? pick up a parenting book ask him nicely try a time out not care because he's a kid and hes supposed to jump on beds?

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: What did one car say to another? A: Nothing. Cars can't speak.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why do people make antijokes? Because they can

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats big brown and sticky A sappy oak tree

thumb_up thumb_down

read this

thumb_up thumb_down

What did one duck say to the other duck? Nothing, ducks cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

thumb_up thumb_down

The white supremisist woman with anxiety dialed the suicied help hot line. The operator that answered was clearly African-American. She then hung up the phone and continued to call back and try again.

thumb_up thumb_down

so a horse walks into a bar right, and he goes up to the bartender, and the bartender being a smartass says why the long face(get because hes a horse), and the horse says his wife is dying of lung cancer, child services are taking his kids away , and im addicted to crack and that is why i have a long face the bartender then gives him the next round for free and the the horse dies of alchohol poisoning

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are Red Violets are blue I like poo F*** on You By drew bolton

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Cavan keely's the type of guy who drives past hilltown screaming GET IT THE VAN!!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Where's my shotgun

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you avoid dying? You can't everything dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

(Family sat down at table) *Child goes to start a story* - "I have a ginger friend.." Everyone bursts out laughing and leaves the child confused.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops