What do you call a gay woman who likes to smoke cigarettes? A lesbian with a possible nicotine addiction.

What happens when you shoot a priest in the heart? He dies.

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

What do u call a black rapper who only raps about sex and money? lil wayne

Why did the blonde have the biggest tits in 3rd grade? She's 21

Why did the black surgeon get fired? The hospital was low on funds due to the economic crisis, and had to let a few employees go.

A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says: why the long face? Horse: I have cancer

If the red house is made out of red bricks, the yellow house is made out of yellow bricks, and the blue house is made out of blue bricks, what is the greenhouse made of? Ah, I see what you did there. You are expecting me to follow the sequence based on how each house is made out of bricks the same color as their title. However, I am one step ahead of you and I know that the greenhouse is made out of glass panels. But what if it were made out of green glass panels? Then, I suppose, the sequence could continue naturally yet we still have a problem of units - bricks vs. glass. Quite the dilemma we are facing.

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch."

Whats brown and slippery? A brown slipper.

whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

Scientist 1: "What's your research paper about?" Scientist 2: "Homosexuality in fruit bats." Scientists 3, 4 & 5: "AHAHAHAHA LOL WUT"

Heartlight

Watch your lips.

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

What do you say when you take a nasty shit in you friends bathroom? There's some nasty shit in there.

What did Don King do with his new boxers? Put them on with a respectable pair of trousers.

Why didn't the man cross the road? He was paralyzed.

what do you call a kid without arms and legs? names

How much does a polar bear weigh? The average male weights approximately 1150lbs.

The WNBA

Yo momma is so fat, I gave her a cupcake and she enjoyed it.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo Boo hoo? Boo hoo your parents are dead.

Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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