a retard lost...

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What's worse than tieing a baby to a moving fan? Stopping it with a shovel

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Shut up and stop laughing, Daddy's balls aren't gonna lick themselves.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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What do you give a small child when you don't have any candy? Nothing, you just kidnap them.

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So a duck walks into a drugstore and asks the clerk for lip balm. The clerk asks, "How will you be paying for that?" to which the duck replies, "Cash."

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Why did the Mexican jump the fence? He was at his neighbors house and it was shorter to cut through yards than to walk to his house

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Knock Knock Whos there? I dunno I didnt answer the door

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Why couldn't the baby boy read the book? He had eye cancer and was therefore blind.

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What kind of car does Yoda drive? Nothing, Yoda doesn't exist.

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THEN WHO WAS FONE?

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Q: What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A: A pool table

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I SAID I WANT A GLASS OF JUICE. NOT I WANT TO GAS THE JEWS!-hitler

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Why'd Katie fall off the swing? She had no arms

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KNOCK! KNOCK! Who is it? Wood pecker. Wood pecker who? KNOCK! KNOCK!

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What's the difference Justin Bieber and a Dic* the Dic*

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how do you make a baby cry kick it off a cliff

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What do you call a middle eastern man flying a plane?? A pilot.

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Why did the black man leave the bar? Someone shot his girlfriend.

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i did your mom......a favor. by making you......... a sandwhich. i rubbed her pussy.........cat. she saw my dick.........tionary. I slapped her ass...........what i did.

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Q. How did the little girl fall of the swing? A.She got hit by a fridge

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Knock knock Who's there? Rick Rick who? Your wife's boss. I regret to inform you that your wife has sustained a injury on the job and she is in intensive care... I also regret to inform you that your insurance doesn't cover the injury

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Why does matt daly get confused for? A Penis

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Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was tied to the first Monkey. Why did the third Monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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