why was there a man outside the 56th floor window? he was a window washer and needed the money.

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why did the black child get sent to child services? because he has an abusive father and an alcoholic mother

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Why was the baby crying? He saw a black guy

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What gas station can u make a Kwick trip at? Kwick trip

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How do you burn a lot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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How many cows can you fit in a field? It depends on how big your field is.

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Do you know why the Mexican didn't like hot dogs? I don't know either.

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Why can't Helen Keller hear? She's dead

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Roses are red, Violets are black, Why is your chest, as flat as your back

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Ask me if I am a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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a mushroom walks in to a little boys party the boy says why are u here mushroom says because im a fun-guy (fungis,fungi)

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I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

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what is Justin Bieber+ One Less Lonely girl.... A BABY

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#1 rule in arguments: if losing, start correcting their grammar

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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There are two hippopotamus' in a pond cooling off from the hot day. One is named Nathaniel IV and the other Timothy. Timothy asks Nathaniel, "Nathaniel, what day is it today?" Nathaniel then replies," I believe it is Tuesday." Timothy is taken back then replies," How odd. I could've sworn it was Wednesday."

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Q.whats the worlds funniest joke???? A.not this one this ones crap

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Yo Momma is so fat, she often chooses to take the elevator instead of the stairs.

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Why was the little boy late to church? He was getting raped by the priest. ....the priest was late too.

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A priest, rabbi, and mormon are arguing about which religion is best. A zookeeper hears and says, "I have a bear who is sleeping right now. How about whoever converts the bear belongs to the best religion?" The priest goes in first, and then walks out a few minutes later, unharmed. The mormon does the same, and he too exits unscathed. The rabbi goes in, and walks out covered in claw marks. "How'd it go?" Said the zookeeper. "Easy." Said the priest. "I just sprinkled some Holy water on him." "I did the same." Said the mormon. The rabbi looked at the zookeeper and said, "have you ever tried to circumcise a bear?"

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There was a homeless man living all by his lonesome on a street corner, desperately begging for money. Suddenly, a car comes to a screeching halt and out of the window flies a thin, square piece of plastic. The hobo successfully catches it in both hands. "Whats dis?" he says, "What da hick can I do wid a stinkin wada plastic?" he says, failing to realizing the significance of the thin square of plastic, for he is but a hobo and has been out of touch with reality for quite some time. After some time, he gains back his common sense, "Aha!" he shouts, "it is but a condom!" A few days pass, the man wondering alone in search for a way to make use of his prized, plastic square. He encounters a beautiful female hobo (at least he thinks she is) and they make love. So not only does the hobo make use of the silly condom (which expired-he just doesn't know) he get's laid and keeps warm in the brutal winter weather by getting cozy with the hobo chick. There are some pros in being a hobo, you know. After a month, both hobos make the faithful decision to join their cardboard boxes together, thus creating a new home where they live happily ever after <3

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Try saying "Good Eye Might" without sounding Australian.

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Abe Lincholn had a son :) But he died |:

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What's worse than finding your dad's wedding ring while fingering your sister ? 3 bee stings.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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