- Anti Joke

Why is Osama bimladin dead? Because he was a threat to American for many years, and someone finally found him and killed him.

What did Death say to Life? "Look, I respect that you waited till after I broke up with Sandy to ask her out, but it's still a little akward for me, so although there are no hard feelings, it's probably better if we keep our distance from each other for awhile."

Okay, So a Cow, a Lumberjack and a Fireman walk into a bar. The cow asks the bartender, "What kind of milk do you have?" The bartender looks confused and asks," Why would a cow want milk?" The cow replies,"I've been producing milk all my life and I've never had a chance to try it. I'd just like some milk." The bartender replies,"Okay we have whole milk, 2%, and skim milk. What'll you have?" The cow says,"Whole milk, I want the whole deal." The bartender obliges. Next the Lumberjack comes up to the bar. The bartender asks, "What'll you have?" The lumberjack asks for some syrup. The bartender inquiries,"What kind of syrup would you like?" The lumberjack answers,"Pure Maple, imitation, or chocolate. All work for me." The bartender turns and pours a shot of pure maple syrup and turns away. Finally the fireman walks up the the bartender and says, "Can I have a glass of water?" The bartender turn and ask inquisitively,"Why?" The fireman quickly replies,"TO PUT OUT THE FIRE!"...

Why do flamingos hold up one leg?f If they held up two they'd fall down.

What do you get when you put the head of a lion on the body of an eagle?2 dead animals and a fine for killing protected species.

What did the dying boy get for Christmas? Presents

A man is talking nonsense at a wall when another man walks up to him. "Why are you talking at a wall?" "I'm trying to appease the mighty wall god Kaleothayrhonka." "Cool, let me join you!" And they both talk at the wall for hours on end because they are stupid that way.

What is Kanye West's main goal in life? To crush the hopes and dreams of singing stars on national television, beginning with Taylor Swift.

whats worse than shitting in a urinal??? shitting in a shower

What is worse than 20 black men stealing your TV? Having your family die in tragic car accident.

Why did Lady Gaga arrive at the Grammy's in an egg? Because she was born that way.

(speaking to an orphan) knock, knock who's there not your parents

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why is Osama bimladin dead? Because he was a threat to American for many years, and someone finally found him and killed him.

There once was a man from Nantucket who had an affinity for wicker furniture.

What is green and is a dub dub. A green dub dub.

What did the young boy get for christmas? Parental divorce

...NO.

Knock Knock. Who's There? silence... Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

Why do blondes like cheez whiz? Because it tastes good

Why did Michael Jackson became a white person? Because the society hates black people

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jewish people aren't edible.

Why wasn't the black woman allowed on the bus? It was rush hour and the bus was full.

YOUR MOM HAS A DICK IN HER ASSCHEEKS!!!

Roses are red, Violet are violet, not blue, dumbass.

Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A: One stops sucking when you slap it.