Whats worse than a paper cut? Nine/Eleven

what do black men and vending machines have in common? neithier work and they both steal your money

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

You have 5 $1 dollar bills. Your mom rapes you and you still have 1 $5 dollar bill.

Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I am pregnant And it's your baby

Two generals went for a trip, it went very well in general.

Justin Bieber walked into a gay-bar, The whole world applauded.

A blonde walks into a bar She said, agh that hurt

A priest a rabbi and an iman are stuck in the desert. After walking for days without rescue or civilisation in sight, and rapidly running out of food and water, they decide to each pray to their respective gods for rescue, and in doing so solve the ultimate question of which religion is the true religion. They all die.

What do you call a puppy with no eyes? Ugly.

Eine blonde Frau mit ihrem Sohn in Walmart, da sie die Lebensmittel-und Getränkebereich zu nähern, sehen sie ein mexikanischer Mann Blick in die Eier. Der Mann bittet um Hilfe aus der blonden Frau über die Qualität von Eiern. Sie sagt, ABD Eggs sind die besten, so dass die mexikanischen Kerl entscheidet, dass. Beim Verlassen des kleinen Jungen zeigt auf den Mexikaner Jungs Hut und ruft: "Aliens!" die Mutter bekommt wirklich peinlich und ruft ihren Sohn für sein Verhalten und sagt, es ist nicht richtig. Die Mutter wird erleichtert, dass sie sagen, dass die mexikanischen Kerl konnte nicht hören, da er Musik hören. Auf dem Weg aus der Mutter entdeckt einen violetten Flüssigkeit tropft aus der mexikanischen Jungs Haar. Sie fragt ihn, und er antwortet "Sein das Haargel". Die Blondine und Sohn nickt und setzt auf ihr Leben

Why is six afraid of seven? There might've been a little shooting accident a few days ago which put his mother in the ER. If anyone asks go to a bar and think in your head why you would ask something like that. Let it sink in.

How many WOMEN does it take to change a light bulb? YOU ALREADY KNOW ITS GONNA BE MORE THAN ONE!

What did the teacher say to the student? Get in the closet

why did the farmer cry after a phone call? he just found out his wife just died of lung cancer

SIMPLE EQUATION: John has 32 chocolate bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

Why did the man have a hole in his head? He was shot.

What did the man say when he was hit with a flying watermelon? Ouch.

What do you get if you cross a bulldog with a schitzu? A half breed prone to allergies and breathing problems.

my mom raped yerr foot

SCHNARRRRRR!!!!!

What's worse than a needle in a hay stack? A needle in a stack of drug addicts.

- Knock knock - I have a doorbell

Why is Ian a virgin? Because he watches cartoon porn

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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