What did the gun say to the pencil? Draw

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Dave: Hey, Doug! How was your day? Doug: My mother is dead.

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A man walked into a bar and it hurt.

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Knock knock Who's there? Joke Joke who? Auntie Joke Great, could you bake me those cookies I like.

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what's yellow, dirty, and looks like a potato? a potato

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What did the Muslim say to the Sikh? "Hello. Lovely weather today."

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Q.) How do you fit a baby into a bowl? A.) With a blender! Q.) How do you get it out? A.) With Tostitos! -Sebastian and Chris (aka 100 and Zelot) (we did not make this joke, we just had to share it)

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How do you have sex with hellen keller? Very sweetly

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why was your family so sad? because you died due to your uncle's son's cousin urinating all over you as a baby causing you to sting yourself continually. did i mention you were born as a scorpion while your family members were all human beings making them neglect and throw you away in their trash when you would always climb out. your family secretly hid affection for you. back to the beginning. when you died everyone in the whole world except bill cosby got cancer at the exact moment you died, but years later (because bill cosby is immortal), he got down syndrome after everyone who was alive during your death died. that is why he goes doo dop bip babbity today.

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Me: Hello. You: Oh, hi. Me: How are you today? You: I'm fat.

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Ian is cutie!!!!!;)

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear made her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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Why'd Sam run away Because charlie bit his finger

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two.

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Where do you find a one-legged cat? Right where you left it.

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What is blue and smells like red paint, Blue Paint

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what did Santa Claus say to Nikki Minaj? I really admire your musical talents

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Three men sat at a pub, it reminded them of this joke they once heard

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A sprayed behind is a clean BEHIND!

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WHat did REAAAALLLY Jesus say when, walking on, wat, er?, Will somebody please get me of this floating piece of ice? Please? Stop screaming HALLELUJAH! People: HALLELUJAH!

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Yo mama is so hot that she needed to lower the temperature

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What's worse than 10 dead babies nailed to 10 trees? 1 dead baby nailed to 10 trees.

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The cow went moo

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A man walks into a bar. ouch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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