A Jew, an Atheist, and a Muslim walk into a bar. They each drink a bottle, have a conversation, and leave.

What did the robber take from the store? The managers dick

What did the blind guy say when he walked past a fish store? Something smells fishy

A black man boards a plane. He enjoys the rest of the flight in first class.

Two muffins are being baked in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "Man, it's starting to get really hot in here." The other muffin says, "MUFFINS CAN TALK?!"

Why was the toddler laying in the middle of the road? Because she was the victim of a hit and run...

A blind man walks into a bar with a guide dog in one hand and his girlfriend in the other. The bartender says "Nice dog." The blind man says "Thanks."

Yo momma so ugly that she had self esteem issues and committed suicide, making her husband extremely depressed.

Why didn't the blind girl say hi to anyone? Because she was blind.

What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? Wait a week.

Why did the dog run away from home? Because dogs are absent-minded and they don't know any better.

Q: why are black people good at basketball? A: because they practice

yo mama is so dumb she went to dr. dre for a pepsmear

A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

What time is the dentist appointment? Time for you to get a watch

A girl talks to her boyfriend about collage. What is his responce? Nothing. No one talks about college.

Why was the chicken sad because it lost it's family

What happens when you mix Fluorine, Uranium, Carbon, and Potassium? NaBrO

Pickup line: Hey do you like flowers? Because you stole my flowers.

What did the innocent little girl get for Christmas? Lymphoma.

What is the biggest fictional book ever made? Either the Bible, or the Dictionary.

Roses are angry Violets are too My head is scratchy I need shampoo

What are the four season of Canada? Cold, cold, cold and road work.

A doctor is delivering a baby on April fool's day. He says, "Congradulations, it's a boy." He then says,"April fools! Your child was stillborn."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...