1 + 1 = 3

what do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? nothing since it is impossible to combine a cat and a dog

A flock of ostriches run into a mine field

Why did Lady Gaga arrive at the Grammy's in an egg? Because she was born that way.

women playing football?

Why does Santa go down your chimney? Because he is to retarded to use the door.

why are gays soo happy , becuase the dont have to listen to women

Two Jews were fighting over a penny and then they realizde that they may be made fun of for this and quickly stopped.

Zach Murfitt has a huge penis! Lol jk he has an inchy stryder

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear made her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

why?

a kid calls 911 and says ,"is this 911?" and the operator says ,"NO! THIS IS PATRICK!!!!!!"

Republicans

How do you know that someone is polish ? They smell funny

PUDDING

A Jew, an Atheist, and a Muslim walk into a bar. They each drink a bottle, have a conversation, and leave.

What did the robber take from the store? The managers dick

An elephant walks into a bar..what the hell

I see, said the deaf man to the blind guy.

A dog is walking down the street. The dog catcher promptly arrives and takes him to the pound. Two months later the dog is in a new, happy home with a wonderful family.

what's difference between a pile of dead babies and a car? I don't have a car in my garage.

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate sex Especially with you

Yo momma so ugly that she had self esteem issues and committed suicide, making her husband extremely depressed.

A blind man walks into a bar with a guide dog in one hand and his girlfriend in the other. The bartender says "Nice dog." The blind man says "Thanks."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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