Why was Veronica lying on the sidewalk? She was just in a drive-by shooting.

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Chicken eats your pie filled with monkey guts!!

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Nothing because saying a fish can talk is like saying Obama is a good president.

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What's long, hard, and filled with semen? A submarine

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic with a family of four and is ruining his life. -Tag

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Q: Why are black people so good at basketball? A: Because they are black!

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a bucket of crap? One is alive meanwhile the other is an object full of solid waste.

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Yes, but he hasn't.

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A fish finds that his fishbowl is on fire. He escapes the bowl only to realize he is equally screwed.

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What's worse than ten babies nailed to one tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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why did the black child get sent to child services? because he has an abusive father and an alcoholic mother

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Why didn't the family go through the door? Because it was a window.

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Why did the man take off all his clothes? He was going to take a shower.

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Are you from Tennessee? Because I can tell by your accent.

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Q: What did Batman say to get robin into the Batmobile? A: Robin, get in the Batmobile!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jimmy Tyler, your son Hi son *continues to open door

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a man walks into a gay bar. he was gay.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Violets are red. Roses are blue. I am drunk, and i'm about to spew.

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How heavy duty are your nachos? No, because babies simply cannot swallow blenders.

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What did the squirrel say to the owl? Nothing, because owls and squirrels don't talk, but the owl ate the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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