A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then he sits down to enjoy his evening.

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What's worse than discovering that you have contracted HIV? Stumbling upon a mass genocide. HIV's pretty bad though.

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Why can't Abraham Lincoln lie? Because he is dead.

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what do you call a black guy fixing your electricity an electrician

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Roses are gray. Violets are gray. I am a dog.

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How did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs? Chris

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Why must you never cross an elephant with a human being? It is impossible anyway.

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this is the part where we na na na na every good song needs a na na na na wake up at night screaming na na na na my grandmothers nickname is nana

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Why did the girl get hit by the bus. Because she was Helen Keller

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Seriously tho, too much sex? I need to know dog.

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What's the difference between a cake and Jews? A cake comes out of the oven.

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Why i'm breathing? I don't want die.

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What did one hostage say to the other hostage? Hrmfhrmfphmfr

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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You have such a big heart (Girlfriend) The doctor's think dangerously so (Guy)

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What did the man with five penises say? I have 5 penises.

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How did the magician make it look like there are 2 books on the table? By putting 2 books on the table

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Whats worse then any minority? inter-minority breeding.

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how do kill a black guy? shoot him in the face

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what glows blue and howls at the moon at midnight? I dont know but i had sex with your mother.

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Why did the Muslim get on the plane in New York? To go visit his dying aunt in Memphis.

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Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because his school was nuked.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A black man is a human, with feelings, living cells and a loving and devoted family, while a park bench is made from wood and metal and used purely for people to sit on. In parks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops