What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungie cord? My ass.

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A black man boards a plane. He enjoys the rest of the flight in first class.

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What do giant panda bears eat? giant bamboo

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I'm a necrophiliac. Keep watch over your dead friends... ;)

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well the duck walked up to a lemonade stand, and he said to the man, running the stand "quack" then went on its way

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What did the robber take from the store? The managers dick

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You: Mike and Steve were playing chess, who won? Them: Mike You: no, it was steve

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How do you get a black person to drop chicken? Yell KKK.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks.

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Q: Why did the Klansman go up to acclaimed rapper and television star, Flavor Flav, and say "Do you know what time it is, boy?" A: Because his trademark "bling" seems to be an actual functioning time piece. Q2: Why did that same Klansmen brutally murder Flavor Flav after he learned it was 5:46 in the pm? A2: Becasue Flavor Flav is black and that's kinda what you're expected to do in the Klan...

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peter charastabopouloulous

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Why did the baby start crying? Its mom slapped it in the face, causing permanent brain damage that would haunt it throughout its life.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, I Love The Music Only Jazz and Blues.

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Q: What do you call a women with 2 bowling pins? A: A women with 2 bowling pins.

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I like to eat people

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

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Q:What is the differenc between batman and a black man? A: Batman can go out in the night with out robin

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "My wife just died from pancreatic cancer."

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whats worse than shitting in a urinal??? shitting in a shower

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What did the dying boy get for Christmas? Presents

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When life hands you lemons, Squeeze them in the eyes of children

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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A black guy walks into a shoe store and buys a pair of size 14 shoes. The cashier smiles and says: so is it true what they say about big feet? The black guy laughs for a moment and responds: yeah it's really hard to find socks that fit.

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"Doctor! Doctor! It hurts when I urinate!" "you may have a kidney stone"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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