Knock knock, Come in...

What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

What's worse than your dad being hit by a car? Your family being hit by a bus.

What did the pear say to the plum? Nobody knows - the plum was deaf and didn't hear, the pear knows only dirty words in sign language, and there was nobody else around to overhear.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Diarrhea

Why is it called a tea kettle Because it is a kettle and you make tea in it

"Have you ever seen a blacksmith?" "No." "Me neither."

How do you stop the skunk from smelling, you rip it in half and bury the body therefore stopping the smells from escaping.

involved parents.

Knock knock Who's there Interrupting camel (Interrupt with nothing) Camels can't talk.

Why did the kid stop going to school? His alarm clock broke.

What do you do when you see Godzilla? You offer him ice cream.

why cant Joey jump for joy? beacause hes dead

Why did I put the baby into the blender feet first? So I could see its facial expression

two blondes walk into a bar... to get to the other side

this is gay

Two buissness men had a meeting at 12:00 they had there meeting at 12:00 and left back to there normal life.

Why did the American run over the black man. Because he didn't see him standing there.

Your mother is so unintelligent that her IQ score is equal to or lower than 2 standard deviations below the national average of 100 on the Mensa approved intelligence test that has been properly administered and supervised.

So a Jewish, Hispanic, and Asian man are on a plane. The pilot turns to them and says "aren't you tired of this?"

Your social life.

What's black, white, has green stripes and smells like eggs? I don't know. That's why I'm asking.

Why did the black man get arrested? Because he was in possession of powder cocaine, which is a schedule I narcotic in the United States. This incident probably would not have happened if an end was put to the war on drugs, which is notorious for disproportionately targeting blacks and other minority groups, even though whites are statistically more likely to use such substances.

What's worse then finding a finger in your Chili? Getting Mollested by a Pterodactyl.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...