Why is an orange, orange. Because you can't clean a window with a spade.

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There is a bird and a squirrel in a tree. Later, as a farmer walked past, the squirrel ate the bird.

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Whats big, white, and will kill you if it falls out of a pine tree? A refrigerator

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his dying grandma in the hospital

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There's 2 cows, one says to the other "What do you think of Mad Cow Disease?" The other says, "I don't care I'm a helicopter"

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Hello. We would like to talk about Jesus with you.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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anti jokes aren't always funny on here

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A blonde, a Brunette and a Redhead walk into a bar. They all buy a drink and talk about their days.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Joseph. Joseph who? Joseph Brown. Oh, hello Joseph! Why don't you come in? No thank you.

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Why did the boy fall out of his high chair? I'm not sure.

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Roses are red Violets are blue So is your face Cuz I just gagged you

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What's the difference between me and a ghost? Ghosts aren't Dolphins!

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What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt will thank you.

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Yo momma is so fat I really feel sorry for her.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? You hit him with an axe How can you release your anger at somebody? Kill them How do you stop a bus? Throw small children at it

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if a green person is sitting on a green couch in his green room in his green house on his green lawn in his green town, what color is the sky? blue of course. while it is possibe to paint or make all things described in the above paragraph, you cannot paint the sky green because it is actually the color of light when the suns rays reflect on the water droplets within the ozone layer, thus forming the sky. the sky is not a tangible object, so therfore the paint would not be able to properly rest and dry onto the surface.

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What is funny about family guy?the jokes

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The man with a long history of Alzheimer's once said: Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cheese n' toast

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted to be cool, But I look like you

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Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch."

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How do you make a girl wet? Throw her in the pool

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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