What do you call a retarded sheep? Whatever it's name is. There's no sense in torturing it by pointing out the disability which has made it a social outcast it's whole life.

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How do you make a ninja fly a plane? You put a gun to his head and say fly this plane.

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A visibly exhausted and distressed man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink. "Long day?" the bartender asks. Since the man understands the meanings of most common phrases he responds in the correct and expected manner.

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How come George hit his face when he fell? He had no arms.

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Q. What does McDonald's and Michael Jackson have in common? A. They both stick their meat in 13 year old buns.

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Wanna hear a joke? Joe Jonas.

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What happened to the boy who cried wolf? He died.

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One day, John ate some food. He quickly realized he had an upsetting feeling in his stomach, so he stopped eating food and used the restroom. Then he drew a picture.

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This message is boring. There is no joke. There is no punchline. You can stop reading now.

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brian mcgee is gay!

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How do you make Al Gore cry? Kill his daughter.

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What do dead people think when they die? Nothing,they're dead.

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What does a farmer say when he can't find his tractor? - Where's my tractor?

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Swiggity Swooty. I'm currently in pursuit for that part of your body people refer to as "booty".

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It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

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Women's rights

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What did the cow say to his friend? Moo.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Ze Gestapo!

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what is big and white? the moon

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Minecraft.

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What do you call two black guys having sex with Paris Hilton? N*ggas in Paris

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Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

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What do you get when you cross a zebra and a panda? Well, pandas are almost extinct. I guess they gave up and started goin' with zebras.

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A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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