Doorbell salesman.

Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No

Why the girl fell from the swing? cause she had no arms

How much did the Holla Cost?

Q: Who are the fastest readers? A: 9/11 jumpers 200 stories in 5 seconds

#1 rule in arguments: if losing, start correcting their grammar

A bus full of orphans falls off a cliff.

A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable son of a BITCH!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

Yo Mommas so poor, when i went to her house and started to clear out the cob webs, she said why the heck are you tearing down the curtains.

68 :)

What do you call to guys who gave gave each other HIV? Blood-Brothers

AVB

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

how much is a microwave full of dead babies? a fridge full of dead puppies.

what did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright in the middle of the night, To find nothing amiss.

Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

Q: What is a duck's favorite thing to smoke? A: Quack

Why grannies do not buy a menstrual pads? Cause they will never have their period anymore.

Why did Susie fall off the swing - because she had no arms Knock Knock Who is it Not Susie

A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

Yo momma is so fat, I gave her a cupcake and she enjoyed it.

What's another name for a black priest? An African American Priest.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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