Why did the man buy a large butcher knife and a shot gun at 3am while his family was asleep at home? because he suffered from insomnia and figured running some errands would give him something to do. his wife had also been telling him that their current knife was getting old and rather dull and since one of his favorite hobbies was duck hunting he decided it wouldn't hurt to buy a new gun considering it was on sale for a reasonable price

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Hey, are you 5? Ya I am 5 inches deep in your MOM!!

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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69

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Why did the dog smile? It didn't. Humans are the only creatures on planet Earth capable of smiling, therefore, dogs are unable to smile.

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what did the fish say when he was eaten by a shark nothing fish cant talk

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What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

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You should never talk to strangers.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at rhyming Refridgerator

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Why did Billy drop his ice cream cone? Because he was hit by a truck.

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Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

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If you replace all the letters in your name with G A Y it spells Gay... your gay

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Q: Why do so many people write "So a man walked into a bar" A: Because they lack the intellect to think of something creative, and still other peoples material.

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Your maternal figure contains so many Triglycerides, her belt size is greater than or equal to the circumference of the Earth.

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What do you get when you mix tea and sugar? sweet tea...

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What do you call a kid on crutches? Crippled

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Joey mayer's face

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Yo momma so Fat that she got picked for the Olympic Swim Team

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Your momma is so fat, that her doctor recommended that she goes on a diet in order to prevent early death caused by a heart problem.

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And the winner of Miss America 2050 is... Britney Spears!

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so there are two muffins in an oven. one muffin says to the other muffin, "hey is it hot in here or is it just me?" the other muffin says, "holy sh*t your a talking muffin."

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a guy gets knocked out and wakes up in a alley all bloody and a knife next to him!!!

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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What sound does a baby make in a blender? Idk, i was too busy masturbating to hear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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