what do you get when you put a baby in a blender? salsa how to you get it out? tostitos

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q:What did grandma get for christmas? A:a coffen

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A rabbi and a jew walk into a bar and had lot's of crazy anal sex ... then asked god for forgiveness. the end

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two Jews walk into a bar, and they were both served properly

thumb_up thumb_down +1

we sat at the table and began to say graceme my sister, me and my mom we bowed our heads and closed our eyes and said grace we lifted our heads and opend our eyes and the food was gone my mom was gone and the chocolate in my pocket was gone (i wonder who did it lol)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A black guy walks into a shoe store and buys a pair of size 14 shoes. The cashier smiles and says: so is it true what they say about big feet? The black guy laughs for a moment and responds: yeah it's really hard to find socks that fit.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what's 2 + 2? i don't know that's why i'm asking you

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's red and hurts your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the bus drop a boy holding ice cream? Its driver was not paying full attention on the road and was sentenced 15 years for manslaughter.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what do you call 6 black guys hung in a tree? a arazona wind chime

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was the chicken sad because it lost it's family

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a black person with food stamps? A freeloader.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Are u that bald or is your neck blowing bubbles.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Yo momma so ugly that she had self esteem issues and committed suicide, making her husband extremely depressed.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Did the boy ever tell you how he died? Trick questions he's dead, deceased bodies can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Are you sure Jewsus was not a Jew?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

There was a baby, and it wouldnt stop crying. So the mom shook it and shook it. Then it stopped crying.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A blonde walks into a bar. She is rushed to the hospital and treated for a broken nose and a busted lip. She now has a deformed nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's a skateboard without wheels A snowboard

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: What happens when you hit a man with a car? A: You speed away hoping no one saw, you spend the next month and a half agonizing over your crime as it consumes you because you think of the poor man's family, then you either go to prison or hang yourself from a fan all because you wanted road dome....

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is worse than something terrible happening to you? That same thing happening to me of course... Duh...

thumb_up thumb_down -1

"You know what my motto in life is?" "No" "Oh, that's a shame."

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops