What did the coach do to the player Coached the player

What do you call someone in Manhattan who goes to see a Broadway show and then stops in at a local bar for a few drinks? A taxi, if they request you do so.

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

Why was little billy sad? He had a crouton stuck up his asshole.

What do you call a really small grape? A grape.

what do you do if you see an asian trip on a step? help him/her up and ask if their alright.

Why did the family go to Mexico? Because they were deported

What does a human have in common with a tree?? You can cut a humans leg of and count the....oh wait

penis hehehehe

There was a peice of lasagna. He knew he tasted great. So he constantly feared for his life.

What did the cancer patient say after the little boy told him a funny joke? I'm dying

Q:What is a black guy running with an iPod in his hand? A: A person who enjoys to listen to music while running.

two black guys are in a car. Whose driving? The question is too broad. Either one of those men or unmentioned people could be driving the car.

Why was the little boy so bad at the piano? It was his first time playing it.

What has two eyes, two arms and two legs........ a woman who lost her baby to a miscarrage.

Parents: What do you want for your birthday? Boy: A yellow ping pong ball. 7th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball 13th birthday P: What would you like for you birthday son? B:A yellow ping pong ball. P:Hmm, fine. 17th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: That's is I'm getting you a car! Day before 18th the boy drives into a bridge. He lies in his hospital bed and his parents are there. P: What would you like for you birthday tomorrow? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: Fine. Why do you want these ping pong balls anyway? B: Because. And then he died.

What did the onion say to the the the other other onion Ima cut you fool and make yall cry

What do you call to guys who gave gave each other HIV? Blood-Brothers

What's the same between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed here!" A 14 year old walks out of a bar.

Knock Knock? Who's there? Dr. Fishbourne Dr. Fishbourne? Yea, I've come to inform you that your son has committed suicide due to lack of parental care and love.

How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face.

69 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH *goes crazy and shoots himself*

What's the diffrents beetween a carrot and a dead baby? One I like to eat in my soup, the other one s a carrot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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