What did the baby with Downs syndrome say to the baby with cancer? Nothing, baby's can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Did you hear about Judith? she was hit by a bus!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why was little johns' stomach in discomfort? because his mom accidently gave him mercury for breakfast

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: What's the biggest difference between a black man and a white man? A: Their skin color.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

no

thumb_up thumb_down +17

it was christmas day and the boy opened his first present... and he immediately got aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock. who's there? well, its not suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Farts smell bad!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did John forget his homework? While driving herself home at 8:00 PM the previous evening, his mother got into a terrible automobile accident. She was rushed to the emergency room, only to find out that one of her main arteries in her right arm was cut. Death was probable for her in the next few hours. John and his father, sitting at home playing a friendly game of chess, were notified of the accident by hospital secretaries. His father rushed John with him to the hospital in his Toyota Camry. Upon arrival, they were notified that John's mother had only a few moments left to live. They ran into her room, and said their last parting words. John's were "I love you, Mom.", and her husband's were "I love you, honey." She then passed away. John began to weep, and his father put his arm around him to try to comfort him, while feeling extreme sadness as well. Around this time, back at home, his dog, Rex, ate his homework that he left on the dining room table. John and his dad then drove back home, crying their eyes out. This kind of sadness they have never experienced before. He will always remember his mom, and love her to bits. His dad, well, he was never really the same after her death. The funeral was scheduled for the next week. John will always remember his mom as being a nice, caring individual with so much love for everyone in the world. Him and his dad later picked out a nice, blue coffin that reads "You will always be missed" on the top of it. They chose it because John's mom's favorite color was blue.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

roses are red violets are blue i dont give a damn how bout you

thumb_up thumb_down +15

roses are red violets are blue i have deep vein thrombosis .... perpendicular albatross

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 'Cause 7 slept with 8 and punched 4 in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Will my son live, doctor? No because you don't have a son and I am not a doctor

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Dead babies and disabled kids. Jews, mexicans and black people. Hitler and prostitutes. Sex sex sex sex sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the Asian man do when he got lost in the desert? He ate his arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you get a hot blonde to do your laundry? At knife point.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: Your arms are tied and bleeding from your face, a bull is charging at you, a catapult launches a bunch of rottweilers with rabies straight at your face, a nuclear bomb right next to you is five seconds from exploding, and my teleportation device ia right next to you, what do you do? A: You start by getting your own damn teleportation device! The hell ill let you bleed on mine!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why does Susie fall off the swing? I shot her in the head with a pistol.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

This is Jeff and I gots to take a HUGE SHIT. I bet its gonna be smelly and runny. After I wipe I'm gonna lick it and taste it. I bet it tastes GOOD. I hope it has a lil blood in it too.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the black boy fall? he had terminal cancer and couldnt stand the pain anymore he died

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you cal it when a black person gets married to a white person inner racial marriage

thumb_up thumb_down +13

asian drivers.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you save someones life? Do not kill them.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops