What did the the Priest do to the young alter boy? Blessed Him

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Haikus are awesome but sometimes they don't make sense hippopotamus

Siblings are like sharks, they usually stop biting you when you stab them in the eyes

What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? heart worms

How much Cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? A lot!

Why is an elephant large, grey and wrinkled? Because if it was small, round and smooth it would be an aspirin.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE

What did the Asian man do when he got lost in the desert? He ate his arms.

Why you so fat... Because you have an eating problem fatass...

what's worse than finding a fat couple in a buffet?

George Michael walks into a bathrom.....

So. The gays. ...

How do you make time fly? Well! You cannot really make time fly. Imean, yeah, iguess it feels like time flies when your having fun, but it moves just as fast as always!

Your mother is so stupid she never finished College thus having to work many menial jobs to provide for her family.

Knock knock Who's there? Sergeant Sergeant who? Sergeant John Clancy. I regret to inform you that Billy your son has just unfortunately been killed in the electronic fan factory in which he works.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

What did the blind man do in the dark room? Nothing, he couldn't see.

What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt will thank you.

miley cyrus

How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb 500 , 1 to hold the lightbulb, 499 to spin the house

I don't do cocaine I just like the smell

I used to play Skyrim but then I took an arrow in the knee. Then, I played MW3 until I took a bullet in the elbow. And now, I'm in the hospital wondering why people keep harming me.

How do you get a clown off a swing? You hit him with an axe How can you release your anger at somebody? Kill them How do you stop a bus? Throw small children at it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...