Knock Knock Who's there? Kconk Kconk who? Kconk Ohw Oh yeah, sorry mate, didn't recognise your voice! Come on up, I've got some lagers in the fridge.

Are u that bald or is your neck blowing bubbles.

roses are red violets are blue oranges are......

How do you kill the President of the United States? Your name has been reported to the authorities.

What do you get when you cross a donkey and a horse? a mule

you wanna know hellen kellers favorite game? Marco Polo!

roses are black violets are too im colorblind how about you

Alex Eggbert

hey what are you eating there? a giant scorpion that tried to rape me.

whats worse than stubbing your toe? being gang raped and then killed

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Watching your house burn down and your family scream in pain as their flesh burns and you suffer from chronic depression.

What is the difference between dead babies and a corvette? There is no corvette in my garage

What happened to the boy who cried wolf? He died.

What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungie cord? My ass.

what do you get when you put a baby in a blender? salsa how to you get it out? tostitos

Knock Knock Who's there? Rob Rob! I haven't seen you in ages come on in.

I have a black guy in my family tree? Yea, his still hanging their

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

#scabbers

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

what language does the turtle speak? i dont know I'm not a turtle.

What do you call a black person with food stamps? A freeloader.

- Mom, you've got a banana in your ear. - Son I can't hear you I've got a banana in my ear!

Why did the kid punch the other kid. Because he was black.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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