What do you call the alarm system in a failing inner-city school? A dumbbell!

Why did the man burn all the children? He was a psychopath.

How many monkeys can play COD at once? It depends on how many controllers you have.

Customer: Can I have a tin of red paint, please? Shop owner: I'm sorry sir, we only have yellow paint left. Customer: That's ok, I have my bike with me.

What do you call 10,000 black men with their heads sticking out of the ground? Afro-turf

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. No, the Holocaust never happened, you're an idiot.

Name two things that are stupid and can get stupider. You can't , there's only one a blonde

Whats worse then this joke? Its punchline.

what's retarded and has red hair? You. ;)

lyren is a big meanyhead

What did the homosexual find when he proceeded to his mailbox? His mail.

Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake!

A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

Who makes the sandwiches in a lesbian relationship?

I may be schizophrenic, but at least I have each other!

What did the gravel say to the road? Give me the D.

Where is my tractor?

What the kid with no arms get for christmas? A baseball and a glove to go through with his dad

Roses are red. Violets are red. Tulips are red. My garden is on fire.

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they are highly trained astronauts taking part in a multi-year space journey to explore part of the solar system that man has never dreamed to be feasible.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Yes, but he hasn't.

A Muslim walked out of a bomb shop.

Halo < COD

Why did the mother have a club in her hands covered with red liquid? She spilled her bloody murry while playing golf.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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