What did the widow get for her birthday? Nothing from her husband.

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Chuck Norris can bench 210 pounds.

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What did Batman say to Robin before the got into the Batmobile? - Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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Dear crush, I want to drink you

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Why was the fat person sad? Because he was fat.

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What did the blind man say to the librarian? Hello, I am looking for books that are published in braille.

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Why didn't the lactose intolerant man get a drink at the bar? He was the designated driver.

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Why did the spider cross the road? He was stapled to the chickens back.

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roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf.

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What do you call a black person that went to medical school? A doctor

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Your mom is SO ugly, I entered her in an ugly contest, and she came in fourth place!

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Why does Susie fall off the swing? I shot her in the head with a pistol.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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roses are red violets are blue i have alzheimers roses are red

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What is blue and smells like red paint, Blue Paint

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A Tatooine moisture farmer, an old man, an astromech droid, and a potocol droid walk into a cantina at Mos Eisley Space Port. The bartender says, "Hey, we don't serve their kind here! Your droids will have to wait outside." The moisture farmer then says to his droids, "Why don't you wait out by the speeder, we don't want any trouble." The protocol droid replies, "I heartily agree, sir."

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas ? Because sadly his father is an alcoholic and cant support him nor his family.

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What did the blind man get for Christmas? Poison.

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buttcrack thumbs up

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A jew go out of a bar

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Why did Michael Jackson go to McDonald's? Because he was hungry.

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What happened to Emma? I raped her!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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