I saw a shovel once.

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What did the American say to the Russian? Hello, but the Russian did not understand

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 452

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Why "Is Bart Simpson Yellow Its The Only Crayon The Illustrator had

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Where did Suzie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Good boy

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3 penguins meet each other in penguin #1's backyard for a pool party. The first penguin climbs up the steps of the water slide gets to the top, looks around and then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The second penguin climbs up the steps, looks around then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The third penguin hastily climbs the steps and slides down the slide radio -Soulbroker

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John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead. John rolls his eyes at sam very dissapointedly then proceeds to go home. The next day Sam phones John excitedly telling him he traded his Green day tickets for Oasis tickets, a smile appears on Johns and Sams faces, not that they can see each other, they both then put the phone down. An African died. Green Day are a bad band.

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Sticks and stones can break my bones And words can make me lonely

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A turkey and a ham walk into a room. The ham says to the turkey "You're a turkey." The turkey in response says, "Yeah, well you're a ham!" They both then get their heads chopped off, as the room they were in was a slaughterhouse.

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a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says: why the long face? he has cancer

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender asks the rabbi "why the long face?" The rabbi says "to get to the other side." Seeing the puzzled look on the bartender's face, the priest says, "orange you glad he didn't say banana?"

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whats the difference between a pair of shoes, and a computer. alot.

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A man finds a lamp on the beach so decides to rub it. Nothing happens.

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What is the greatest anti-joke ever told? I had it right here, but I lost it when I was being raped by a Triceratops.

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Why did the cat die? Because it got shot by a teenager who was promply put in juvi and was fined $100,000 for animal abuse. The parents gave up on him and didn't pay the fine or bail and left their son to rot in jail.

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Do you know why children in Africa don't read Harry Potter too much? Because they can't read.

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What looks like a dick? A penis

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Why didn't the firefighter put out the fire? Because he wasn't a very good firefighter.

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A wealthy businessman gets into an elevator with a poor, ragged janitor. They take the elevator up 19 floors. As the businessman leaves the elevator, he turns to the janitor and says, "Good day to you, sir."

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What happen to Teenage Mutain ninja turtals? Go Ninja Go.

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-How old are you, Dick? -I'm 30 centimeters old

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A Muslim, a Jew, and a Christian walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Is this some kind of a joke?"

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knock knock, whos there? the repo man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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