how do you wake lady gaga up? you punch-her-face

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why did the dog go inside the church? cuz the door was open.

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*Ring* *Ring* Bartender : Hello? Stranger:Is Mike Hunt their? Bartender: Mike Hunt! Is Mike Hunt here?! Mike Hunt: Oh thank god! I've been anticipating this phone call for a while now! I've been stranded here for hours and my wife's been killed and the killer is still out there!

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My friend is a genius! JK!......... i have no friends

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So a black and mexican go to the foodstore to get foodstamps.the end

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Why did the 5 year-old go to the hospital? He had cancer

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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friends are like potatoes you eat them they die

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the Farmer had treated the Chicken and the rest of his family with great distaste, thus angering the Chicken to the point of rebellion against the Farmer with hopes of inspiring the other abused farm animals to act likewise.

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Two Atheists walk into a bar. A nearby Christian notices this fact and proceeds to slightly preach to both of the Atheists. They then kindly explain that they don't personally believe in God, but respect the Christian's opinion. They all order drinks, and become very close friends, engaging in a long, hateless conversation.

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Why did the penguin go to the cookie shop? He didn't, penguins don't eat cookies

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Hey, Texas! Knock knock Texas: Who's there? Ebola

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Roses are black. Violets are grey. I'm a dog...

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Q: Little black thing with a little red thing on it. What is it?! A: Ant with a broken nose...

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Little Jimmy was afraid, and didn't like Santa Claus. So one Christmas Eve, he poured rat poison in Santa's milk. Little Jimmy no longer has parents.

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Where did Ellen go after the explosion? Everywhere

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Two kids walked into a bar. One jumped over it

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whats green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

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What's the difference between babies and butter? You can't pitchfork butter.

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If I could change one thing about the alphabet, knd stte bporw xzuor flllle !

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Knock Knock Come in

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yo mama is so fat that they call her fat mama

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Whats black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I was dropped on my head as a baby, kjhgfiehcgbfbjebfiuheggfcug

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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