if a green person is sitting on a green couch in his green room in his green house on his green lawn in his green town, what color is the sky? blue of course. while it is possibe to paint or make all things described in the above paragraph, you cannot paint the sky green because it is actually the color of light when the suns rays reflect on the water droplets within the ozone layer, thus forming the sky. the sky is not a tangible object, so therfore the paint would not be able to properly rest and dry onto the surface.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock knock. Who's there? Open the fucking door. Open it! This is a fucking robbery. This is not a fucking joke. Get down on the ground. Shut that baby up. Shut that fucking baby up! Now! Get on the fucking ground or I swear to Christ I will fucking end your life. Tell the kids to go to their room. Do it. Do it, you fucking bitch! Where's the fucking jewelry? You got any money stashed anywhere? Come on, I know it's here. Keys? Your husband got any guns? Give me everything valuable or I swear to god, I will fucking murder you in front of your son. The woman was brutally raped for hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the boy do when he was bored and broke? He took to the streets selling illicit drugs such as cocaine. Although dangerous, the rush from said danger solved his boredom problem. On top of this, there is a huge market for such substances and he was not broke for much longer.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

"Hell nahhh I called shotgun" -Rosa Parks

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's ur favorite color? Cancer Made by mark

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what did the little girl with no arms or legs get for her birthday? a bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what do outgoing girls get on spring break? raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Frog-why did the chicken cross the road Chicken-dont judge me...

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's grey got white stripes and can't climb trees? Car park.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me, AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is black and white and red all over the news paper of someone with tuberculosis

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life moves on, in addition to taking the appropriate amount of medicine as directed by her doctor for her condition.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the main reason for divorce? Marriage.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock Knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did your mum have sex with my mum? Because they're lesbian.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

women playing football?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the frog fall out the tree it was dead. Why did the second frog fall out the tree it was stapled to the first frog. Why did the third frog fall from to the tree peer pressure. Why did the fourth frog fall from the tree the third frog was his son. Why did the fifth frog fall from the tree he thought it was a game. Why did the sixth frog fall from the tree he shared the same body with the fifth frog

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what did Santa Claus say to Nikki Minaj? I really admire your musical talents

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why was the man masturbating? his wife needed a break

thumb_up thumb_down +10

This message is boring. There is no joke. There is no punchline. You can stop reading now.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

No, but it was a nice chance to pretend to, that was the scheme part I might have mentioned, people never figure out that you are fucking them over at the present, if you tell them you fucked them off in the past, they start thinking backwards, often ignoring those tiny details straight in front of them. Listen, call me a bit paranoid, but who the hell is Septimus and AzureDragon or whatever the fuck his little geek name was?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had sinned.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops