Have you seen Helen Keller's back porch? Neither did she.

Q:What did the robot say to the boy? A:Nothing the robot malfunctioned and started choking the boy, despite the towns best efforts they could not release the death grip on the boys throat, after the robot was done choking the boy it exploded killing 99% of the population in a 5 mile radius.

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms. A: Knock knock! B: Who's there? A: Not Sally.

how many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? one and a ladder

Roses are red Violets are blue your mum went to the loo and out came you

Knock Knock. Who's there? Nancy Nancy who? Nancy.

Why did the boy fall down the stairs Because I pushed him

Yo momma so hot she won a beauty contest and was later shot and killed by the jealous losers

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the Farmer had treated the Chicken and the rest of his family with great distaste, thus angering the Chicken to the point of rebellion against the Farmer with hopes of inspiring the other abused farm animals to act likewise.

Whats worse then failing ur English test? Getting hit by a train

whats better than 24................. 25

Why did the child die? Natural causes.

a catholic priest and a young boy

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Why did the seal get confused when a spider tried to high five him? Because spiders have eight legs.

What do video games and school have in common? Nothing, nobody likes school

whats gayer than 2 homosexuals? 3 homosexuals.

A: What happened to the snake? B: It died

A girl asks a guy "How come you don't take me dancing anymore?" The guy said "Because we were both killed in a car accident."

Roses are white, tulips are white, wait whos been masturbating in my garden!

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frost bite.

Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: A deaf guy

What eats dicks for dinner and smells like he just licked an STD infested turtle? Jimmy

How do you stop a skunk from smelling? Block its nose.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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