Why was the tomato blushing? It saw the salad dressing.

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Whats the difference between an elephant and a tomato. You put tomatos in a salad.

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Who makes the sandwiches in a lesbian relationship?

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two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

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Q: How do you fit 100 mexicans in a van? A: Its theoretically impossible.

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What do you call someone in Manhattan who goes to see a Broadway show and then stops in at a local bar for a few drinks? A taxi, if they request you do so.

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According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

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What's a small person? A midget

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Q: Why did the man have no legs? A: He lost them when his humvee hit a roadside bomb during his last tour in Iraq.

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Why doesn't Gary like me? Because I killed his family and fed them to him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a wild dog on the other side, so he crossed the road to avoid potential danger.

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How could problems have been avoided in the old west? Bigger towns

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Why did the man eat his hat? Autism.

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"Why did the chicken cross the-" "Gosh! Why can't we just live in a world where a chicken can simply cross the road without being questioned about it's motives?!?!" ~McKenna<3

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Why did the leprechaun cross the road? If you still believe in leprechauns, you need to see a doctor.

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What do you call a dead baby lying in the road? A Tragedy

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I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

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Q:What did the ginger get for Christmas? A: A soul...jk,hair dye

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whats the difference between a joke and the holocaust? ...There both funny..Exept for the Holocaust.

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? the bear got shot

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One day Satan, approached his dad and said: DADDY I love you so much, I want to be just like you! That story did not end up so well did it?

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs in a pool? A: A man with no arms or legs in a pool.

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how do you wake lady gaga up? you punch-her-face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops